Shanghainese men simply see it as their responsibility to provide their families with a wealthy life. But the Shanghai husband’s legendary tolerance can single-handedly turn a lava flow into a pile of dead ashes, or a volcano to be enjoyed and admired like Mt. The relationship between mother and daughter-in-law is like an active volcano in the Middle Marriage Kingdom. Chatting with a married Shanghainese man, you may need to wait hours before he stops talking about his wife…. Family prideĬhatting with a married Western man, you may need to wait hours before he mentions his wife. When shopping with her Shanghainese boyfriend or husband (yes, Shanghai men shop, remember “ma” from point number one?) the Shanghai female doesn’t need to carry any bags, including her own petite purse…. The exception is when the term is used to describe men in Shanghai - guys who don’t just shop, wash and cook, but famously do so without complaint…. Ma da dao is Shanghainese slang meaning, “shop, wash, cook.”… It’s also supposedly home to outstanding husbands: 1. Yes, Shanghai boasts more than just the Bund and that stop-till-you-drop insanity on Nanjing Road.

A few years ago, I discovered one of the most striking headlines about Asian men as marriage partners: “China surpasses the world in yet another category: Quality husbands/Shanghainese husbands are renowned as the best in China, and maybe the world.”

Pearl River Drama by Ray Hecht